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Thursday, August 2, 2007 &

im feeling sad, confused and at loss.. i dont wish to go Australia to study.. i dont want to leave him.. i love him too much to be apart from him.. i need him to be by my side every single day.. maybe im too dependent on him.. but only with him i can be myself, i can be happy.. cause he's the only person that can give me what i had lost long ago..

right now.. daddy is forcing me to go Australia to study for 3 years!! 3 YEARS!!!! WITHOUT HIM BY MY SIDE PUSHING ME ON!!!!! i dont think i can do it.. i cant bear to leave him.. he means too much to me.. but he said that studying is really important for my future career and promised me that he'll wait for my return.. so that we can be together forever.. build our love nest.. have our own kids and everything..

however.. this nightmare comes to me every single day,every single hour, minute, second.. im really afraid that i'd lose him to someone in the next 3 years.. i have faith in him.. i really do.. but these bad thoughts just keep coming back to me.. its haunting me..

i cant live without him i guess.. i really cant.. i need him in my life.. no one.. and i mean it NO ONE can seperate us.. life's really meaningless without him.. anyway.. if i really have to go Australia to study, im gonna give it my best shot.. so that i can come back earlier to be reunited with him.. my loved one.. my one and only one..

i love you always forever, near or far, closer together, everywhere i will be with you, everything i will do for you.. say you love and love forever, never stop, never whatever, near and far and always, everywhere and everything~~

i love you dear dear lao gong!!!!! no matter what we shall never be apart.. never!!!!!!!


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- Name: Cyndi Allison Heng
- Nickname: Azumi ^^
- D.O.B: 10 January 1989
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